What is Sensation Play?

Sensation play is group of erotic activities that arouse the senses, or heightens one particular sense, while dulling others. Sensation play usually involves the sense of touch, one of the most obvious senses that enhances sensual pleasure. It can be a sexy way of touching your lover that is a form of erotic foreplay.

However, it can also involve heightening any of the senses including sight, smell, taste, hearing and touch. Heightening our senses during sexual intimacy or foreplay enhances all sexual experiences and puts our bodies in tune to pleasure. In this heightened state, it allows you to experience the pleasures and ecstasies of sex to the extreme.

Most often sensation play is sensual in nature, arousing, erotic and gentle. In BDSM, it could also involve pain play which release pleasurable endorphins and create a “high”. Often in sensation play one sense is limited (like sight by being blindfolded) while another sense is heightened and aroused, like the sense of touch.

Types of Sensation Play

Sensation play can consist of various activities. This could include the use of blindfolds or bondage to remove sight or mobility, while heightening another sense.

Heightening Taste

The use of blindfolds to remove sight and heighten the sense of taste was used in the movie “9 ½ Weeks”. In the hottest scene in the film, Mickey Rourke’s character blindfolds Kim Basinger’s character and feeds her different types of food like cherries, whipped cream, jalapino peppers, and honey to create different taste and texture sensations in her mouth. In this instance, it is taste rather than touch which is the heightened sense. Check out my article on aphrodisiacs for some sexy foods that you could recreate this scene with!

Bonus Tip! You can also use the sense of taste while playing with sensual flavored products, like chocolate massage syrup drizzled over your lover’s body to turn them into a delicious oral treat!

Enhancing Touch

This involves the use of blindfolds and bondage to enhance touch. Touch is erotically heightened and charged when our other senses are removed. A simple erotic massage can become so much more by just applying a blindfold. Erotic tickling can make someone orgasmic when they are bound and can’t move.

Various types of touch can be explored during sensation play including the use of feathers, silk, fur, or leather. Or, you can just use different types of touch with the hands and fingers from soft and light, to firm or rough. Even just the act of kissing can be heightened. Biting, nibbling and licking the body are all other ways to arouse pleasure. Or using hot and cold temperatures like ice, or hot candles wax, or melted massage candles.

More extreme types of sensation play could involve full body bondage, the use of nipple clamps, or pinwheels to stimulate the pain/pleasure response. Erotic spanking could also be a form of sensation play.

Sex toys can add a lot of sensation to various erogenous zones and are effective tools for erotic sensation play.

Sensation play adds a level of eroticism that can bring your arousal to new heights of pleasure as you are swept away by the power of touch.

Bonus Tip! Try alternating different types of touch to change it up and create suspense. Variety is the spice of life.

The Sense of Smell

The sense of smell is a powerful sense and can bring us back to moments in the past that can become almost tangible. You can arouse the sense of smell by lighting sensual candles, or adding scented herbal oils to your play. Erotic scents include vanilla, lavender, Ylang Ylang, musk oil, cinnamon, cloves, and sandalwood. There are also sexuality products on the market that use pheromones to heighten the sense of erotic smell as well.

Bonus Tip! Rub lavender essential oils on the temples to relax your partner.  Or try a spicy mixture of scents just below the nose to arouse their passions.

Sounds and Silence

The sense of hearing can be either aroused or dampened during sensation play. You can play erotic music in the background to heighten the sense of hearing. Talking dirty, or whispering in their ear is another form of heightened this sense, especially if they are blindfolded. Or you can use earplugs to remove the sense of hearing, with a blindfold, which creates erotic suspense and anticipation. If your lover can’t see you or hear you, you can really play with the element of surprise!

Bonus Tip!  Try a meditative CD for doing erotic massage techniques.  Or a fast bumping and grinding tempo for a sexy rhythm.

Erogenous Zones

During sensation play you want to focus on arousing all the other erogenous zones in the body, while avoiding the genitals at first. Check out my program on the other erogenous zones to begin with here such as the ears, nape of neck, nipples and breasts, and even the feet.

Use light touches with your fingertips, or soft scratches. Knead, rub, massage, pinch or tickle. Use your mouth to nibble, bite, lick, suck, or blow on different areas of the body. Try a fork to lightly trail goose bumps down their skin. Use an ice cube or cold spoon left in the freezer to play with temperature sensations. Erotic toys, especially those made of metal, glass or silicone can also be heated or cooled for erotic play.

Don’t forget the various types of sensation lotions, lubes and candles that can be used to heighten the senses. There are various types of lubes now that cool, heat, tingle and are flavored. Then there are massage oils and candles that warm and heighten the sense of smell and touch. There are also sexual enhancers made specifically for the genitals that bring the blood flow to that area of the body and heighten arousal.

Take it Slow

Sensation play is a sensual experience and shouldn’t be rushed. Go slow and explore your lover’s body. See what reactions you get by trying various things. While you can’t use everything above in one play session, pick one to three things you’d like to try like a blindfold, types of touch and a vibrator, and explore.

Tease your partner erotically so they build up sexual energy and arousal to a place where they are ready to burst. Then give them the orgasm they crave as fireworks go off in the senses!

Tools for Sensation Play

• Blindfolds, silk scarves, and sensory goggles.
• Hand cuffs, bondage rope, a silk tie and bed restraints.
• Warm massage candles, hot wax candles made for sensation play, and warming lotions.
• Cooling and tingling lotions, ice, and popsicles.
• Furs, feathers, silk or satin.
• Forks, pinwheels, or wooden skewers.
• Nipple clamps, clothes pins, or nipple suckers.
• Ear phones, ear plugs or sensual music.
• Aphrodisiacs, sexy foods, flavored lubes.
• Scents and pheromones.
• Your hands, fingers, mouth, tongue and teeth.
• Sex toys including anal toys, dildos, vibrators and kinky toys.
• Sensual massage products and arousal lotions.
• For spanking use your hands, a small soft flogger, a crop, a spatula, or a wooden spoon. Just be careful not to get carried away and hit too hard. The idea is to create erotic sensation, not pain.

So, there is your introduction to sensation play. As you can see, the types of activities you can try are only limited by your imagination. Make sure to talk to your lover about these activities first and get their consent before trying them out. And, make this a playful adventure of exploration, rather than worrying too much about it. Let your sense of play and your lover’s response guide you for the best erotic encounters.

Play safe and have fun!

Kisses,
Fidan Paula

P.S. For an in-depth guide on how to become a Vagina Master, click here to check out my program – Vagina Masterclass.

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With the new popularity of Fifty Shades of Grey, women are starting to embrace their “kinky” side. So, guys, you better get on board the kinky train because your lady is going to want to try out some of the new sexy kinky stuff she is learning about.

What is Kinky?

Every society develops morality norms, rules and standards for behavior, including sexual behavior. What may be “acceptable” or normal, or popular sexual behavior now, may have been very taboo not so long ago. For instance, sodomy (anal sex) was still against the law in the some states until 2003. Nowadays, anal sex, along with many other types of taboo or kinky play are becoming more mainstream and accepted as just different flavors of sex that some adventurous couples want to try. In other words, human sexual behavior is a cultural construct, influenced by what a particular society deems acceptable.

Are You Adventurous?

As long as you are practicing “safe sex” and everyone playing is consenting adults, there is no reason not to add a bit of sexual adventure into your love life. I like to think of “kinky” sex as a more playful type of sexual expression that allows us to unleash our inner fantasies in a safe way.

From rough sex, to blindfolding, to playful spanking, KINK or BDSM is more mainstream than ever.

Fantasy

When we were children we knew instinctively how to play and act out games and fantasies. But, as adults, we have lost that ability to play, learn, explore and try new things.

Kink offers us ways to bring back that sense of wonder, exploration and fun we once had, but in a new, very adult way.

In one of my recent articles, I wrote about the top female fantasies that many women have. These include scenarios of sexual dominance and submission, and the surrender of control. Many men have similar fantasies as well, which can complement their partner’s fantasy.

When practiced safety, sanely and between consensual adults, these acts are considered by most to be just another form of sexual expression.

Types of Kink

Kinky play includes many types of erotic activities which fall under the umbrella of BDSM which refers to bondage and discipline, sadomasochism, and dominance and submission. While some of these terms may sound a bit scary, they are only names for various types of kinky play. Within KINK, there are many activities that couples can explore together such as role-playing, bondage, spanking, discipline or punishment, dominance and submission, power exchange, as well as the full spectrum of mainstream sexual interactions.

Role-playing

Role-playing is like playing dress up and then taking on a certain role that you play out during a sexual “scene” or erotic play. Usually, the characters will complement each other, but be unequal in power: one who is dominant and the other submissive. The dominant is usually the giver, while the submissive is the receiver, but the roles can also be interchangeable.

You have likely heard of or fantasized about different types of these scenarios such as Master/slave girl, Teacher/schoolgirl, Doctor/nurse or patient, Pirate/captive, Boss/secretary and so on. These are just a few of the most popular types of role play available, but let your imagination be your guide!

Dominance and Submission

In Dominance and submission, one person plays a dominant role, while the other person takes a submissive role like those listed above. You don’t have to “play” a role in order to be either dominant or submissive in the bedroom. You can just be you, being more dominant than maybe you usually are, while your lover becomes more submissive.

Of course, this is something you would both discuss together and agree upon.

First, you would discuss your fantasies or what types of dominance and submissiveness you want to try. Decide on specific activities you’d like to try and also express each other’s limits as to what is off boundaries. In BDSM culture, those playing together usually rely on a “safe word” as well, such as RED, which lets everyone know that play needs to stop. This is a safety measure in case something becomes too intense or no longer feels safe, which can happen when you are exploring new things and pushing your usual boundaries.

Dominance during sex play could be holding someone down during sex. It could be giving someone orders, or talking dirty to them or calling them dirty names. It could involve tying someone up and doing bondage, or erotic spanking. It could involve types of extreme sensations like pain and pleasure mixed together for an erotic experience. Hair pulling, spanking, and types of sensation play could all be a part of the body’s sensory experience.

Bondage

Bondage is being held down or tied up during sex or erotic play. Bondage refers to “restraining for pleasure”. The pleasure could be in the visual appeal in how someone looks when bound, which can be erotic to the giver, or physically pleasurable to the one receiving or being bound.

Ways to use bondage include tying with rope, using hand cuffs, bondage tape, blindfolds, or mouth gags, and even a sex swing can become a bondage device.

Some people find being bound very erotic, while others hate it or are claustrophobic. So, be careful when playing with bondage and always make sure you have a quick way to unleash your victim, like safety scissors if you are using rope. Also, make sure to learn how to perform bondage correctly, and learn all the do’s and don’ts.

Sensation Play

Sensation play is a way of touching your partner in a sensual way to bring about various sensations on the body. It can consist of using a feather, silk, or fur on their skin while they are blindfolded, or ice and hot wax. Other toys like pinwheels can be used to give a prickly sharp type of sensation. Read my article on Sensation Play here.

Spanking

Erotic spanking has long been a part of many couple’s fantasies. It entails a Dominant who takes the submissive over their knee (or restricts them in other ways like bondage) and spanks their bottom. The point is not to give pain for the most part—although pain once eroticised can become very pleasurable—but to give another type of sensation and pleasure.

Spanking can also be about humiliation, or being treated as a naughty girl, or one deserving punishment. In that aspect, it can be more of a mind game and is about the act of submitting, rather than wanting to feel pain. A submissive is someone who likes to submit, and be dominated. While a masochist is someone who likes the feeling of pain and eroticises it into pleasure. These are two separate types of people, although some people enjoy both, so be sure you know why someone wants to be spanked, or dominated first.

So, there are just a few Kinky Shades of Play for Beginners. Stayed tuned to stripoffers.blog for more information on kinky play (coming soon) and other types of sexual adventures for couples!

Play safe and stay sexy!

Kisses,

Fidan Paula

P.S. For an in-depth guide on how to be a master of Oral Sex, click here to check out my program – Oral Rapture

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“Anyone who is observant, who discovers the person they have always dreamed of, knows that sexual energy comes into play before sex even takes place. The greatest pleasure isn’t sex, but the passion with which it is practiced. When the passion is intense, then sex joins in to complete the dance, but it is never the principal aim.” – Paulo Coelho

Hit a Roger Federer-grade tennis point and you Instagram it. Beat your 10km running time and you Facebook it. Finally see what all the fuss is about with sex and you… don’t tell a soul. It’s time to give shyness the unfollow and start sharing sexual discoveries as well. And why? Because the more we know about each other’s sexcapades, the more we realize there’s not one way to enjoy being horizontal. Here, I reveal everything about what can make good sex even better. Get ready for those happy aftersex selfies!

Clitoral two-step

It sounds like something off Dancing With The Stars, but the clitoral two-step – that’s touching her clitoris, then stopping – can do things for your partner’s body that no rumba ever will. Take your fingers away from her clitoris two or three times to hold her off on coming. A longer build-up to orgasm beats a couple of seconds of actually orgasming. The reason the stop-start technique creates a bigger build-up (and release) is down to her vulva’s muscle memory. When the muscles, nerves and tendons experience pleasure from a particular type of technique, they’re triggered when that technique is felt again. For example, if you find stroking the left side of your partner’s clitoris gives most pleasure, the next time that the left side is stimulated it remembers the pleasure and intensifies it. On every restart, her muscles remember the feeling and build up even more pleasure. Which can mean a stronger orgasm when you finally decide to go all the way. High five for the pleasure pause.

Alternative oral fixes

The old oral involves going down, right? However, for some new and improved mouth time, I suggest raising the game… literally. If you lick her nipples while she’s on top, the chances of her orgasming during penetrative sex raise considerably. The reason nipple play can tip your partner over the edge is because having her nipples sucked stimulates the brain in the same way as her clitoris and vagina. It also releases oxytocin, which makes nipples go hard instantly. How? Oxytocin causes the muscles underneath the nipple to contract, pulling skin and creating that goosebump-like effect. With a bit more breast attention, oxytocin continues to be released – research in Archives of Sexual Behavior found the intensity of women’s orgasms increased with the amount of oxytocin in their blood. A rather lucky one per cent of women are thought to come purely as a result of stimulation to their nipples, known as the oxytocin pathway to orgasm.

The eye contact ban

Closing your eyes might transport you into Fantasyland (otherwise known as Eva Mendes’ bathtub), but it can seriously intensify the pleasure that you get from your real-life sex co-pilot. Being blindfolded during sex makes you so much more sensitive to anything that your partner does. Imagine the crescendo of your favorite TV drama, when your whole body is on alert for the twist that’s coming. It’s the same thing. Our eyes are such an important part of sex (eye contact, looking at your partner’s body) that when you are stripped of that sense you need to compensate. The whole feel of a partner’s touch becomes more intense; the sound of their breathing more erotic; the smell of their scent more powerful. Blocking sight really makes you appreciate all of the other crucial senses during intimacy. Just make sure that you grab a nice scarf for this sexcapade – not the crusty sock from under the bed.

The super-squeeze finish

Most of us know the “pre-finish”. That moment of mental paralysis that comes – just as you’re about to come – and makes you start to question, “Er, what if I don’t?” It’s Mortein for your mojo. But there’s an override. Instead of just focusing on finishing, you should tighten and release your penis muscles, focusing on how good that feels. It lets you concentrate on physical pleasure – rather than the mental block. You might just be part Jedi.  Or even Yoda. And it’s true. Squeezing those muscles is a great distraction. While it won’t necessarily make it any easier to orgasm, it will increase pleasure. Plus, it’s a great way to tone them. And it’s the same with your partner as well. If she squeezes the muscles of her vagina, she increases sensation during orgasm, which leads to stronger, more powerful waves of pleasure. Here’s hoping you give good resting clench face.

Hot embraces,

Fidan Paula

P.S. Click here to learn more about building up your sexual routine with new and improved techniques!

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“I swear to you I won’t stop until your legs are shaking and the neighbors know my name”

I once heard a stand-up comedian say, “Sex with the same person is like eating the same type of cereal all the time – boring”. For starters, anyone who can compare sex to eating cereal has never had great sex. Sex that can be likened to a box of cornflakes lacks emotional and spiritual intensity. But the comedian was right in one sense – careless sex does get boring when it’s focused on fulfilling physical urges instead of accomplishing intense intimacy. If you are having sex only to gratify your sexual appetite, then sex is just like cereal – a dry, sugary substitute to a hot meal. And your partner will feel that. If you want to make sure she’s pleased in the sack, you will have to keep things interesting. Read on for tips on how to do it.

Switch up the sequence

Nothing bores a woman between the sheets like a mechanical mattress routine. You know the drill. First you kiss her, then you touch her right boob, then you move south for 2.5 minutes, then you have sex. It’s so predictable! To avoid putting her to sleep with a sex-by-numbers habit, you need to change the order. When a woman knows what’s next, she will space out and detach from the experience. If she doesn’t know what’s coming though, she will be totally in the moment. So next time have a full-on makeout session right after intercourse. Or stop midsex, give her some oral loving, then get back to business. Bringing an element of uncertainty into your sexual relationship can be rejuvenating and powerful. It reawakens your curiosity about each other, gives you courage to try new things, and builds confidence. Think of it as an adventure, and forge ahead into uncertainty when you or your partner feels out of balance.

Take it outside

The bedroom is a convenient and comfortable place to get busy, but it can get a little old. Thankfully, there are other places that deserve to be christened. There’s an element of danger when you take sex outside of the bedroom. Even in your own home, there’s this sense that someone might walk in on you at any moment, which heightens the excitement. So instead of racing to bed the next time you are eager to get it on, test the sturdiness of your kitchen counter instead. Or move to the bathroom and enjoy stand-up sex in the shower. If you’re an adventure-seeker, you can even go for a drive and then pull over for roadside action.

Make it all about her

Show your partner how into her you are by devoting an entire night just to pleasing every inch of her body. When the focus is all on her and she doesn’t have to do any of the work, she will relax and completely surrender to the sensations, which will allow her more intense pleasure. Not only that, it also shows her that you get off on getting her off, making you look like a selfless sexual stud. Try loosely tying her up so she knows you are serious about taking care of everything.

Indulge in quickies

The whole marathon-sex, hours-of-lovemaking thing is nice and all, but sometimes you just want to wham-bam and be done. When you have fast, urgent sex at the spur of the moment, it makes the woman feel like she is so irresistible you must have her right then, and that is incredibly arousing. There’s also something naughty about getting busy without any of the intimacy you might normally have with your partner. To make your quickie really exciting, I suggest leaving most of your clothes on. It says “I want you so badly that I can’t even take the time to rip off that skirt”.

Hot embraces,

Fidan Paula

P.S. Sex with the same person gets boring only if the couple allows the relationship to get boring. Emotional and spiritual intimacy makes for sex that never gets old. Also check out my latest program Vagina Masterclass where you will discover the perfect tools for liberating the female orgasm.

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“Sharing food with another human being is an intimate act that should not be indulged in lightly.” – M.F.K. Fisher

You learn a lot about someone when you share a meal together. If your date makes the experience uptight and restrictive, well, the sex is going to be horrible too. Eating is best when there is spontaneity and variety. Even if you’re a type A, and many things in your life are about control and domination, eating should be a submissive experience, where you let down your guard and enjoy the ride.

I for one don’t have much patience for people who are self-conscious about the act of eating, and it irritates me when someone denies themselves the pleasure of a bloody hunk of steak or a pungent French cheese because of some outdated nonsense about what’s appropriate or attractive. Stop worrying about how your breath’s going to smell, whether there’s beurre blanc on your face, or whether ordering the braised pork belly will make you look greedy or fat. Eating with abandon couldn’t be more of a turn-on: it shows that you’re comfortable with yourself.

A perfect date is with a person who eats without fear, prejudice, or concerns about her appearance. I remember one of my first dates with my partner: he ordered a six-pound lobster. I sat there, enraptured, watching him suck every bit of meat from it – he got a standing ovation from the floor staff. He’s the kind of man who will order filet mignon as an appetizer followed by a T-bone steak. His fearless, open-minded approach to food is completely alluring.

A table for two

It’s also wildly exciting to be open to the unfamiliar, because it just might be delicious. And I know not everyone can travel the world, but wherever you are, you can explore. One of the best things about cuisine these days is that you can ‘travel’ the world without leaving your town. From vibrant Korean food, to amazing Vietnamese recipes, to fantastic South American and Mexican dishes, you’ve got plenty to choose from.

Don’t worry about the wine list, the white table-cloths, the long tasting menu. Eating with a loved one, as is the case with making love, is about having a self-indulgent time. Don’t worry about how you look and don’t try to impress the waiter with what you know. You can eat with a fork, or even with your hands. It’s all about the enjoyment of the moment and the company and food. And if you can be yourself slurping spicy peanut noodles in front of another person, you may have a keeper.

I promise you will go to a more intense place with your date if you try something new. You don’t bond with a safe order. I’ve eaten fermented shark. I’ve eaten cobra heart. I don’t want to experience these foods again, but I’m glad I tried them. What’s the worst-case scenario? You spend some extra time in the bathroom. (Admittedly, not a turn-on for most people.) But you’ll have a good story to tell. You’ll share an experience. And, maybe, you’ll change your palate forever.

For a dinner date, I eat light all day to save room, then I go all in: I choose this meal and this order, and I choose you, the person across me, to share it with. There’s a beautiful intimacy in a meal like that. It’s about exploration and taste. And kissing after dinner. And maybe there’s a little wine and curry on your breath… and that’s nice.

It’s only when you open yourself to the adventure of the unknown, the strange, even the shocking, that you get to enjoy the sensual, passionate, joyful experience of sharing food and a drink. And it sets the stage for whatever might follow.

Sexiest foods (and why they’re turn-ons)

Peaches. They’re beautiful objects with so much flavor and juice. Damn sexy.
Pasta. The Italians have it exactly right: a big family-style, eat-when-it’s-ready meal.
Lobster. Because eating with your hands is incredibly sensual.
Caviar. A woman eating fish eggs? Oh my God, sexy.
BBQ. I’m not saying eating barbecue is the way to achieve world peace, but it won’t hurt.
Ragu. A simmering red sauce and a hank of meat: smells, sounds and tastes like good cooking.
Steak. Animal protein is a beautiful thing.
Korean-American. Current obsession: raw beef with uni (sea urchin), served on a shiso leaf.

Have a delicious week,

Fidan Paula

P.S. Want to know how to give your woman indescribable pleasure in her vagina, clitoris, and GSpot? I’ll give you the answer through my latest program, Vagina Masterclass, where you will discover the perfect tools for liberating the female orgasm.

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Let’s imagine a little sexy thing like Anna: she has shiny long hair, full lips and she wears a crop top with no bra. She also wears a tight little skirt which shows her toned legs and her perfectly round butt. There’s no doubt: she’s divine.

Every man will look at her with desire in his eyes, but some of these men will also start making assumptions: “She’s way out of my league”, “She probably wants a rich man” or “She’s probably not very smart”. And I get it: we all judge people by appearances every day, it’s just human nature. Stereotypes, while not always fair, are actually a natural social process which helps us interact with people around us. But sometimes, a lot of the times, they stop us from getting what we want.

You miss a lot by judging Anna. You actually don’t know Anna. All you know about her is her appearance, the rest is just assumption — you think she would never share a bed with you just because she’s hotter than the other girls you’ve dated; you think she’s all about the money because she could have any man she wanted; you even go ahead and assume she’s probably not the kind of girl you could converse with about science or art — after all, she’s wearing make-up and long nails, so why would she be interested in other stuff?

But you’re wrong. Here are the most common assumptions men make about women that keep them from getting a girl like Anna or simply experiencing the hottest sex of their lives.

“Women just don’t like sex as much.”

Just because we don’t throw sexual hints at you 5 times a minute and don’t rip your shirt off in public doesn’t mean we like sex less. Women are often just as horny as you, at that same moment, but their hormones make a difference — less testosterone means we can keep our clothes on for longer so that we can evaluate the situation.

Sometimes, women enjoy casual sex just as much as men and they tell me about how good it feels to just let go of everything and fulfil a basic physical need. Other times, women think about a million stuff before deciding that doing it with you is a good idea. They need to feel safe or maybe they just need you to be as emotionally involved as they are. Just because she doesn’t want to have sex right now, doesn’t mean she’s not as crazy about hot sex as you are.

Instead of making assumptions, try to read her body language and understand why she is hesitant about your proposition. It could be that she feels the circumstances aren’t right or maybe she has different emotional needs.

“Women don’t like older men.”

Oh, you would be surprised. Of course not all women like older men — but lots of them actually prefer dating someone older and more experienced, for various psychological and emotional reasons. Some women like the idea of learning new things from a man who has simply lived more. They actually get turned on by it. So if you’re middle-aged or older, don’t just assume that your “glory” days are over. You can still enjoy hot sex if you simply judge less and live more.

I know. It’s not always easy to read female signals and discover which one is attracted to you, so if deciphering body language isn’t your greatest ability, maybe you should check out this helpful program created by my friend, Julian Foxx — it’s called “Ageless” and it’s pretty controversial but I believe it could be a win-win for both parties. Give it a chance. Quick note: This was NOT created by me.

“Women only want men with a powerful status.”

This one is very popular in the modern world. Maybe it’s because now we have access to other people’s lives and situations through social media and reality TV shows. But again, to generalize means to lose great opportunities when it comes to interacting with women.

The “myth” actually says that women value men with powerful status, and men value women who are both youthful and attractive. But this misconception was busted by an experimental study which showed that, in real-life speed-dating scenario, when potential dates were rated on their actual (not ideal) qualities, people of both genders equally valued both sets of qualities. So no more judging — just get out there and approach the girl you like.

“Women have orgasm less frequently than men do.”

Scientists have passionately tackled the myth of the big O. So, is it true that women enjoy orgasms much less frequently than you do? Studies show that women are less likely than men to report experiencing orgasms, but this isn’t the whole story, so don’t worry just yet. The other part of the story has to do with a very strong emotional factor that changes the game for women: commitment. When in a committed relationship, women and men experience orgasms with equal frequency. So the secret has to do less with biology and more with psychology. In long-term relationships, men tend to be more attentive to the sexual needs of their partner.

So this is great news. It means that if you are willing to connect with your woman emotionally, you’re much more likely to give her those amazing orgasms she dreams about.

Hot kisses,

Fidan Paula

P.S. To discover more advanced tips and techniques on amplifying your arousal CLICK HERE NOW!

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And when I’m talking about erotic moves, I’m certainly not only talking about penetration. I know you’re anxious to get in her pants (or maybe my intense training over the years has taught you a little about how to enjoy a hot prelude just as much as she does), but the erotic teasing à la Mr. Christian Grey (the guy from Fifty Shades of Grey that all ladies fantasise about) will make her wet her panties all day. Brushing her teeth, putting her tight skirt on, listening to her colleague complaining about her boyfriend in the office… she’ll be obsessing over you this whole time.

See, the female brain is very interesting when it comes to erotic pleasure. Of course, everything starts in the brain for you as well, but women are wired to make a lot more of those emotional connections that sometimes make her so… intense. This ability will heighten her imagination and create amazing scenarios that would put to shame any porn video you’ve ever watched. And while she’s thinking about all these hot scenarios that involve you, she often gets even more turned on than when she’s actually having sex — because anticipation is just unbearable. Her heart starts beating faster, she breathes heavily, her cheeks flush and she’s touching her neck without even realizing it. Yeah, she wishes you were inside her right at this moment.

But how can you subtly make a woman craving you all day long — even when she needs to get some serious work done but still can’t help but having wild thoughts about you? Prepare yourself because your sex game is about to get a total makeover. Here are my favourite powerful moves you can make on a woman to make sure you invade her brain pretty much non-stop.

Introduce a new move in bed

A friend of mine, let’s call her Amanda, had a great relationship with her boyfriend, but after only 3 months of passion, she was already starting to say no to sex. “Don’t get me wrong, he was a great lover. But I just got bored”, she told me. I wasn’t surprised, because it’s something all couples go through. They do the same things over and over again, and no matter how great it felt in the beginning, too much of anything can take away the excitement factor.

But this is where Amanda’s story starts to get spicy! “One night, everything changed between us sexually. I was trying to just be present for him, expecting the same scenario, when he surprised me with a totally different approach. First of all, he changed the way he was performing oral by using more lips and less tongue, making firm but gentle moves with his mouth and applying more pressure… slowly, which felt so amazing! It was impossible for me to control my body anymore. But that’s that all. When he finally got inside me, he started to grab my waist and pull me into him, like this strong sexy beast that I didn’t even know anymore. The sex was so great that I fantasized about him non-stop the next day. Not just about the sex itself, but more about his attitude. He already knew my body and what I liked, and he took this information and used it to create even more intensity. Wow, that right there changed our sexual dynamic forever”, Amanda confesses.

I can tell you for sure that there’s no greater way to stimulate imagination than novelty. Start a sexual revolution in your bedroom by introducing new moves when your woman least expects it and watch her body tremble with desire (her mind will, too!).

Talk at a slower pace

The way you talk is actually a key factor when it comes to attraction. Biologically, men are attracted to a higher pitch, while women love a confident lower pitch, which signals an interesting man who knows what he’s doing. Something as simple as lowering your voice while still keeping it strong will turn on the arousal button in her brain and make her think you’re inside her even if your conversation has nothing to do with sex. So an efficient method to obtain this voice effect is simply trying to talk slower than normal.

When you talk slower, every word is articulated properly and your tone becomes deeper and more sensual — at least to a woman’s ear! Actually, go even further and combine this trick with a sensual, “innocent” touch on her thigh while talking about something completely random, like the news you read in the newspaper yesterday morning. If your circumstances don’t allow for sex right now (maybe you’re on your lunch break), just know that she will have her way with you in her head until you meet again.

By the way, if you want to learn much more about how to build excitement with your woman through simple conversational strategies, check out this program created by my friend Jessica Lastimosa — it’s called “Speak to Spark Arousal” and it contains some interesting and original tricks which will help you stimulate her mind the right way. Quick note: This program was NOT created by me.

Play a little game

This gets me every damn time. A little fun game in the bedroom will make you both feel like partners in crime and will just stimulate her mind to let go of inhibitions.

Games make us feel safe and free because they remind us of a time in our lives when we had zero responsibilities. When we were happy and careless. This really helps in the bedroom because it makes her let go and enjoy the fun. So say something like “I’m going to just sit here and do nothing. I’ll just look at you until you tell me what to do.” In other words, offer her total control. Challenge her to think of the most pleasurable moves that she wants you to do on her and to say it out loud so that you can execute accordingly. This will not only make her horny as hell and eager to have you again as soon as possible but will also give you the unique opportunity to learn more about what truly awakens her passion.

Take it to the next level and make this game into a secret ritual: tell her you want to play a different game once a month and let her pick the next one. This will keep her mind busy… sexually.

Hot kisses,

Fidan Paula

P.S. To discover more advanced tips and techniques on increasing her arousal CLICK HERE NOW!

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Let me help you take the pain out of pleasure.

We always aim for feel-good sex, but sometimes, the truth is that sex hurts—especially for women. In fact, research finds that some 30 percent of women experience some pain during vaginal intercourse and about 72 percent experience some pain during anal intercourse. Those are pretty substantial figures.

Worried your sex doesn’t feel quite right? Here, let me explain why sex can be painful for women and, most importantly, how to bring pleasure back to the bedroom—and send pain packing.

And since we’re on the topic of bringing more pleasure into the bedroom, check out my program – Bigger and Deeper. No matter what your penis size is, I will teach you how to completely fill your woman’s vagina as if you were twice the size…

Why can sex hurt her?

For vaginal intercourse, often the reasons are aggressive thrusting or sex without a lot of warm-up or build-up—and a lack of sufficient lubrication. (Most women require about 10 to 15 minutes of foreplay). A sex position such as Doggy Style that feels really deep and hits against the cervix or one that doesn’t fit well with your bodies can result in pain, too.

There are also different times of life. Two-thirds of women who are breastfeeding have significant pain during intercourse or vaginal penetration because they have lower levels of estrogen and therefore less vaginal lubrication and less flexible vaginal walls in general.

There are physical reasons sex can be painful, too. Vulvodynia, endometriosis, pelvic floor dysfunction and vaginismus are just some conditions that can make intercourse painful for women.

So how can you make sure she’s not in pain?

When I ask women if they told their partner about their pain, some do but many don’t—and some feel like their partner won’t care so they don’t tell them. Some worry it would be awkward and they don’t want to ruin the mood. You want to be an “askable” partner, where if your partner has any questions, they can come to you and you’ll respond well. Make sure that your partner knows that you always care how sex feels and that you always want to know if something’s not right. If your partner hurts in some way, show that you’re flexible about what your sex life looks like. It doesn’t have to always be intercourse. It could be a broader sex menu with oral sex, sex toys, massage, all kinds of things.

Are there any other ways to turn potentially painful sex into pleasurable sex?

Unless somebody really wants rough sex—and sometimes people do— err on the side of more gentle, nonaggressive sex. If you’re going for harder sex, make sure your partner really wants it for their pleasure, too, not just because they think that it’s what you want. And make sure that you use lubricant.

Bedside buddies

Keep these lubes around handy so she’ll be moaning in pleasure, not pain.

Thicker water-based lubes

Unlike typical water-based lubes, those that are thicker and provide a slightly creamier texture, making it seem like more of a conditioner for your skin, are better because they are designed with comfort in mind – it’s useful not just for time with your lady, but also if you want a less-rough experience with the palm sisters. Also, choose one that’s formulated to be bio-static – it helps stop the spread of bacteria, yeast infections or fungal spores, which takes safe sex to a new level!

Natural water-based lubes

Are you having problems picking the right water-based lube from the wide variety of options? Choose a natural type, because the formula isn’t made with glycerin, parabens, fragrances, flavors or hormones. Pick one that’s packed with soothing botanic ingredients like aloe vera, chamomile and pectin from fruit – it’s all stuff that women find premium.

Hot kisses,

Fidan Paula

P.S. Sex can be a lot of things — great, mediocre, creative, spontaneous — and sometimes it may be painful. To make sure this doesn’t happen to your partner, make sure your communication is smooth and always ask her about her feelings and thoughts after intercourse. And to make sure your sexual abilities defeat expectation and she can’t feel any pain, only immense pleasure, check out my program – Bigger and Deeper – in which I’m giving you some very effective ways to make your penis seem nearly twice as big.

Click Here For More Advanced Sex Secrets…

If you’ve ever thought that there could be more to sex, then you are probably right. An expansive orgasm is an experience that makes you feel like you are finally approaching your full potential for orgasmic bliss. They are within reach, but you will need to do some groundwork in order to open those channels within you.

Expansive orgasmic experiences go beyond what would be considered a regular genital orgasm. Typical genital orgasms last approximately 3–5 seconds in men and 5–10 seconds in women. They are marked by a series of strong pelvic contractions and a sense of release or “going over the edge.” The focus of pleasurable sensations is primarily in the pelvis and genitals. An expansive orgasm is longer in duration and may include a variety of pleasurable sensations felt throughout the body. It may or may not include the same sense of release. Because of its extended duration, the experience is more like a state than an event. There are many different variations of expansive orgasm. Some of the most common names for these experiences are expanded orgasms, full body orgasms, extended massive orgasms, energy orgasms, transcendent orgasms, and Tantric orgasms. Since we have reached this point, why not take a look at this set of rules, techniques and rituals meant to open you the door to these orgasmic supernovas?

There are some preparations that can assist you in finding your way to the various types of expanded orgasm. These preparations may take time to master. They involve opening the body in ways that might be new to you. Practice is necessary in order to develop your capacity for expanded orgasm.

Open your mind

The first way to prepare is to open your mind to the possibility of greater and more intense pleasure. If your mind is not open, you will most likely continue the same patterns and routines with sex that you always have. Consequently, you will keep having the same kinds of experiences.

Be aware of your breath

The second preparation is to bring more awareness to your breath. By focusing on your breath and allowing it to deepen, you will come more into your body and the sensations there. This will also help you access more profoundly relaxed states. You will also become more aware of energy flowing within your body. With this awareness you can begin to release blocks to the flow of this energy. The more conscious you can be of your breath, the more you can use it in a way to assist you in building arousal and expanding the orgasmic energy when the time comes.

Let your energy flow

The third preparation is learning to circulate or stream energy through your body. Once you are open and aware of energy in your body, you can begin to consciously amplify it. By channeling and recirculating energy, you can allow it to build until you feel fully charged. This will enable you to experience energy coursing through your entire being. You may experience the energy starting at the base of the spine, traveling all the way up the spine. It may then shoot out the top of your head. Alternatively, the energy may recycle by traveling back down the front of your body to create a continuous loop.

The journey to expansive orgasms

Once you have done some preparation and feel energetically open, you can begin to set a greater intention to experience more expansive orgasms. You should set aside at least two hours, if not three or four. All of the sexual behaviors that you normally engage in can be a part of this practice. It is less about the particular activities and more about the energy you allow to flow within you. You don’t have to engage in all of these practices in one encounter. In fact, in the beginning it is probably best to pick just one as your primary focus.

Contain your arousal

Having expansive orgasms requires that you contain high states of arousal. Your ability to deepen your breath and circulate your energy will help tremendously with this, as will your ability to simply relax into pleasurable sensations. You want to be able to stay present with and keep inviting in more sensation. If it feels like too much at any point, go back to focusing on your breathing. In comparison, when you go for a genital orgasm, you are looking to climax and then dissipate your energy. Instead, expanded orgasm practices seek to sustain a high state of energy and arousal, without looking to discharge it.

Spread the sweet spot

As you focus on the pleasurable sensations in your genitals, you can begin to allow that pleasure to spread to the tissues nearby. This can be aided by varying the stimulation to make it lighter and broader. It also helps to focus on relaxing the tissues in the rest of your body, inviting all areas to open and receive the pleasure. See how far you can spread the ecstatic sensations into the rest of your being.

Expand your sense of connection

Expanding a sense of connection and oneness to your lover, your surroundings, and all of life will support a more expansive orgasmic experience. If you are with a lover, you can practice being present with each other by looking into each other’s eyes and breathing together. See if you can feel each other’s energy bodies. Let yourselves feel your desire for each other. Let it fill you. Breathe it in. Sometimes this is all it takes to help you access more expansive states.

Hot kisses,

Gabrielle Moore

P.S. Don’t forget there is a lot of energy in you waiting to be released. The level of pleasure attained while at it is only up to you. Take a look and learn how to prepare yourself into making the most of your orgasms.

Click Here For More Advanced Sex Secrets…

Deep penetration can be very rewarding. It provides a sense of satisfaction that goes beyond the mere physical, making you feel deeply connected to your partner. But who am I kidding, the reason most men (and women) crave for deeper, bigger penetration is the fact that it feels very, very good! But they do come with one challenge – they can make you come very quickly. So what positions should you choose if you want both deep penetration AND multiple orgasms? Read bellow, I’ve got you covered.

Reverse cowgirl side-saddle

You lie on your back with your knees bent and legs apart. Your partner gets on top with her back to you, but, instead of straddling you, she puts one leg between yours, with one hand on your chest and the other on your shin. She can then rock back and forth or move up and down as fast or slow as she likes.

Why it’s good. It might take a bit of practice, but I strongly advise you to persevere because it’s one of the greatest position for deep penetration. You’ll feel your penis disappearing completely inside of her and the fact that she chooses the paces ensures she’ll orgasms just as fast as you.

The vixen

Your partner sits on a sturdy table and you stand facing her with your arms around her lower back. She should place her hands on the tabletop to support herself as you slowly raise her right leg and prop it on your left shoulder, then you raise her left leg and prop it on your right shoulder. You can either hold her close against you or she can lean back. For a slightly less acrobatic version, she can tilt her pelvis up and wrap her legs around your waist.

Why it’s good. It’s perfect for stimulating the G-Spot and you can also reach out and double the pleasure by stimulating her clitoris.

Front row seat

Your partner lies on her back and lifts her legs up and over her head as far as they will comfortably go. Once she’s suitably stable, you should squat on top, slide in, and then lean forward to thrust inside her. As she nears climax, you can lean forward and rest your weight on your hands beside her head, deepening penetration. Naughty but oh-so-very nice!

Why it’s good. This moves makes the most of every inch you’ve got. Plus, your partner has easy access to caress your perineum, doubling pleasure for you as well.

The jellyfish

Kneel down while your partner couches over your lap facing you. With your arms around each other for support, work up a rocking motion, moving apart and together in unison.

Why it’s good. It’s intimate yet the angle is just right for both shallow and deep penetration. Your partner’s breasts will also get in on the action by moving against your chest, giving her extra stimulation.

The missionary mix-up

Your partner does all the word here but she gets plenty of rewards. You lie back on the floor, leaning against a sofa or bed for support. She then straddles you with one leg between your legs and one to one side. She should rest her hands on the floor to control her bouncing. You can assist by putting your hands on her hips to help her move up and down if she starts to feel tired.

Why it’s good. It will drive you wild, but she is in control and can set the pace of thrusting, and grind against your thigh all at once. You also get easy access to caress her breasts and bum in between thrusts.

Crossed wires

It might sound tricky but this is surprisingly easy: your partner should lie on her back while you lie across her to make a cross shape. You then put one leg between her legs and the other one on top, and slide in. Ask your partner to flex and release her pelvic-floor muscles to heighten sensation for both of you. Because of the unusual angle, it’s worth using lots of lube to ensure the friction works in the right way.

Why it’s good. It exposes the sensitive clitoral hood, enabling either of you to stimulate it easily. Plus, your muscles will tighten as you thrust, which results in increased friction for both of you.

Hot kisses,

Gabrielle Moore

P.S. To not only feel bigger inside her, but also Last Longer Check out my program “Last Longer Tonight“.

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