“True love is when he holds your hair back while you’re giving him a blowjob.”

Women are incredible multi-taskers. We can, say, go for a jog, and at the same time write a shopping list in our head, dodge cars, sing Beyonce’s latest number one, and motivate ourselves by imagining Ryan Gosling “hey girl” memes.

So it’s not surprising that it can be tricky to turn off our racing brains, even during sexy times. If your partner is like the 55 per cent of women who admit their mind wanders, she probably finds it hard to just be in the moment when going down on you.

So what are women actually thinking about when giving a blowjob? Here 30 brave ladies share their thoughts.

“I hope this doesn’t take too long. Anything longer than one minute and I’m out. Ain’t nobody got time for that!” – Kelly

“Am I doing this right? Why am I doing this? What’s the point of this?” – Ana

“I hope you like that I’m making you happy. What are you thinking about, I wonder. I hope that you’re thinking about me.” – Tammy

“Do not make direct eye contact – or, if it does happen, make sure to give him sexual eyes.” – Michelle

“This is gross. I can’t believe people enjoy this. Can I stop yet?” – Nicki

“He’s making those little noises – he’s enjoying himself. Yeah! Go me!” – Emily

“Damn it. Hurry up will you, my jaw hurts.” – Shannon

“I wonder whether this is the main or the entrée? If I’m not enjoying it, I’m worrying about my gag reflex, teeth replacement and tongue piercing.” – Rhonda

“Well, I hope this doesn’t finish him off.” – Stephanie

“Ok, now that I’m done with the figure eight technique, let’s give the porn star slap a go.” – Cassie

“What’s for dinner?” – Harriet

“The only things I’m thinking are quite sexual thoughts to get myself off, then just lots of nothing. I go into an almost meditative state.” – Christina

“I’m doing good work here; I hope I get the same in return.” – Grace

“Sometimes I fantasize about other guys or imagine someone is watching us, and that really turns me on.” – Carol

“Is it a good idea to stick a finger in his arse? Maybe I should just pop one in there before he even realizes what’s happening.” – Janice

“Ok, I think I’ve got this whole penis thing just about covered, but what am I supposed to do with his balls? They’re just hanging there.” – Sam

“I love hearing the delish sounds he makes while I’m down there; it’s such a turn on!” – Claudia

“Ahh I can’t breathe through my nose. Oh great, now my mascara is running. I’m so hot right now.” – Jennifer

“Geez, does this guy ever shower? What’s that smell? I’m going to kiss him after, just so he knows I took one for the team.” – Danielle

“Why is sex so short, but this takes so damn long?” – Kate

“Don’t look down, don’t look down… Ok he’s looking down, try to look sexy. How do I look sexy with a penis in my mouth?” – Emily

“Dicks are heaps more fun to play with that vaginas; I can’t swing my bits around or slap someone in the face with it. Boo.” – Angelina

“I’m usually just writing a grocery list in my head.” – Lara

“Don’t gag… Don’t gag… Don’t gag… Oh damn. That’s not good.” – Rita

“I’m going to make this the best blowjob he’ll ever have – he’s not going to know what has hit him, and it’s all going to be thanks to me.” – Vanessa

“This is a lot less fun that I thought it would be.” – Anna

“I hope you like this. Please stop touching my head.” – Sophie

“This is exhausting! They don’t call it a job for nothing.” – Trisha

“Try to be sexy and swallow this time. Oh no, no, nooo – the taste! The taste! What is this?!” – Carla

“I wonder if he’s enjoying it. It’s hard to know what a blowjob feels like! I just go with whatever seems to be working.” – Jess

Have a sexy week,

Gabrielle Moore

P.S. I hope you had a laugh over what goes to the girls’ minds when performing oral. We’d love to know your thoughts when you go down on us. Leave them in the comments section! For more information about using your fingers in hot new ways, check out my program on the matter – Flirting Fingers.

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This technique was first practiced over 3000 years ago in India, as an ancient Tantric sexual technique, which allows woman to experience the ultimate orgasm. While 70% of women can only orgasm via clitoral stimulation, this technique involves combined stimulation of the clitoris and G-spot to bring a woman to what is called a “combination” or “blended” orgasm. I like to call it an OMG Orgasm!

Here are the steps in performing the Venus Butterfly technique via manual stimulation.

1. Prepare Yourselves – Lovers should prepare themselves before performing this technique. She should use the bathroom to eliminate any urine as she may experience female ejaculation. He should make sure his hands are clean and well manicured. Both partners may want to do some activity beforehand that helps them relax like taking a bath, yoga, or sensual massage.

2. Prepare Your Space – Prepare your love nest so it is clean, uncluttered and seductive. Don’t forget to put towels and/or a plastic sheet on the bed in case she ejaculates. Create a loving, relaxed and comfortable environment to begin. And, make sure to have plenty of lubricant on hand, which you will need for fingering.

3. Foreplay – Foreplay is an important part of any lovemaking routine as it allows her to warm up which is essential to her ability to orgasm. While some women can do it on the fly, most are not that lucky. So, have a hot make out session to begin, with lots of kissing, fondling, hugging and caressing to get you both in the mood for sex.

4. Oral Sex – Oral sex is a great way to prepare her for other sexy delights to come. Start by opening her labia and licking her vulva from bottom to top and back again in slow sensual strokes, as if you were licking a delicious ice-cream. Next, use shorter, firmer strokes using your tongue in a flickering motion around her clitoris, then back to slow long strokes again. Do this until she gets very aroused, almost, but not quite to the point of climax.

5. Penetration – Next you will use your finger(s) to penetrate her vagina. Make sure to apply plenty of lubricant to your fingers and the vaginal opening, even if she is wet, as this makes the sensations much more powerful. Using one to two fingers, reach about 1-2” inside and locate her G-spot. By now it should be puffed up with arousal. Gently stroke her G-spot with long, firm strokes. Alternately, you can use a gentle tapping motion slightly pressing into the G-spot repeatedly.

6. Clitoral and G-spot Combined – Go back to stimulating the clitoris with your tongue or fingers. Again, make sure you use plenty of lube. Stroke or rub around the clitoris in circular motion until you find her sweet spot. This spot will be at 1 o’clock or (but less often) at 11o’clock from her clitoris (upper left or right) and is her most sensitive orgasmic spot on her clitoris. Continue to stimulate this area until she is ready to orgasm. At the same time, continue to stimulate the G-spot. As she gets more aroused she may begin thrusting her hips and pressing her G-spot into your fingers. Great! This means she is about to orgasm.

7. Don’t Stop – One of the worst things you could do is stop when she is this close to orgasm. Keep going whatever it takes to push her over the edge. As her orgasm builds, she may like a more firm, thrusting pressure into her G-spot, and very rapid flickering on the sweet spot of her clitoris. Follow her body language, moans and verbal commands “Yes, right there!”, but whatever you do, don’t stop.

8. OMG Orgasm – If you have done your job well and she has responded, then she will now be achieving a crazy, ecstatic, body-quaking OMG orgasm, with both clitoral and G-spot blended orgasms combined into one. Way to go!

9. Continuous Orgasms – After the climax period, women have the ability to have multiple or continuous orgasms if you slow down right after orgasm, then continue stimulating once again. You can try this in the future after she has gotten used to the intensity of the combined OMG orgasm.

10. Feedback – After your lovemaking session is a good time to ask for feedback: what she liked most, didn’t enjoy, etc. This will hone your skills and make you a Maestro who is able to play her body like an orgasmic symphony.

 

Hot kisses,

Gabrielle Moore

P.S. Your woman will crave fingering if you do it well – especially since not a lot of men have this skill. If you want to learn more, I recommend you check out my program on the matter – Flirting Fingers.

Click Here For More Advanced Sex Secrets…

“Hey, don’t knock masturbation! It’s sex with someone I love.” –Woody Allen

If there is one thing I know for sure it’s that men are visual creatures. A guy can get turned on by an accidental flash of skin, by a sexy stare, or just the right curve to a woman’s body. Just one look and their brains start working on overtime. Before you know it he’s hard and ready to go. If only women were that simple! But this tendency to be visual can make sex so much more interesting and pleasurable for men. You might like to watch or to do it with the lights on so you can see all of her. You might like to watch her face as she cums.

While seeing it all is a huge turn on, it also has added benefits if done the right way. It can be used as a learning experience. Watching her reactions and body language will tell you that you’re on the right track if you’re really paying attention. Is that face a grimace or an expression of pleasure? Is she pulling back or bucking her hips up toward you? You can learn all about what she likes and doesn’t like just by looking and paying close attention.

Today we’re going to talk about an amazing activity that you can do together that’s hot and sexy and can help you learn just what she likes and doesn’t like: mutual masturbation! You probably thought masturbating was that thing you did when your partner wasn’t around or didn’t feel like having sex (or whenever the mood strikes!), but done with your partner it can be so much more than that!

Mutual masturbation can be done a few different ways and I recommend trying all of them! It can be masturbating yourself while she masturbates herself and you watch each other. It can also be masturbating each other simultaneously. Or it can be taking turns, either masturbating yourself or one another. Here’s where to start:

* I always recommend that you start by masturbating yourselves first. This will give you a chance to observe what she does to herself in order to get some tips for what gets her really hot. Notice the movements she uses, the pressure, the speed and the routine. Does she start out slow and then get faster? Notice if she touches other parts of her body, where and how.

You can first try touching yourselves at the same time since some people might feel uncomfortable masturbating alone in front of someone else. Even though you’re touching yourself, make sure your attention is on her.

* Next you can use the same techniques you observed her use to touch herself. You can either take turns or masturbate each other at the same time. I often suggest taking turns because then the person receiving can focus completely on their sensations instead of being distracted by what they’re doing.

* Mutual masturbation can involve touching yourself or your partner with your hands or with a sex toy. You should always have plenty of lube on hand to make sure things go smoothly. Watch how your partner touches her vulva. Does she focus all of her energy on her clitoris or does she stimulate other areas too? Does she use her fingers or a sex toy to penetrate herself? How is she touching herself? Pay attention to the way she moves her fingers over her body. And pay extra attention to how her touching changes when she cums. Does she slow down? Does she touch herself more quickly or in a certain place?

* Consider using a sex toy for mutual masturbation. Try a small vibrator that can be used externally and that has varying speeds. Or, if she loves penetration, you can buy a dildo that vibrates and has a separate stimulator for the clitoris. Pick out a toy together to make sure you’re getting the kind of toy she likes. Observe how she uses it, where she puts it, what speed and setting she leaves it on. Watch to see if she uses it the entire time or takes breaks.

Mutual masturbation is not only extremely hot and sexy, but you can learn a lot about pleasing your partner. Most men can’t think of anything better than getting to watch their partner touch themselves all night and then end up being a better lover because of it.

Hot kisses,
Gabrielle Moore

P.S. To discover more advanced tips and techniques about oral-finger techniques CLICK HERE NOW!

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“Sex is… perfectly natural. It’s something that’s pleasurable. It’s enjoyable and it enhances a relationship. So why don’t we learn as much as we can about it and become comfortable with ourselves as sexual human beings because we are all sexual?” –Sue Johanson

No offense guys, but I’m about to say something that might just offend some of you. Men tend to be lazy and uncreative when it comes to pleasing women. Now before you get offended by that statement, allow me to clarify. This doesn’t apply to my wonderful readers of course! You’re all here with me because you want to avoid that nasty stereotype. You want to be the lover that your partner whispers to her friends about and just can’t believe how dedicated you are to her pleasure.

Today’s article is yet another way to wow her with your skills and creativity. I can almost guarantee you that she hasn’t experienced anything like this before. And if you do it right, she will be blown away by you and your sexual prowess.

This is a guide to a yoni massage. Yoni is what the female genitalia is called in tantra. This will be a combination of finger techniques, erotic massage, and tantric sex all rolled into one. A power pack, if you will! Here is my step by step guide:

1. Don’t rush. Women in general take more time to get aroused and to orgasm. Some women might feel self conscious about the amount of time they take and this can take her focus away from enjoying herself. Make sure that it’s clear that you are not in a rush whatsoever. Make sure she feels zero pressure coming from you.

2. Begin by placing your hand completely over her mons pubis (this is the mound of flesh that covers the pubic bone – usually covered in hair unless your partner removes it). Let your hand softly cup the area and warm it with your body heat. Put light pressure on the area.

3. Lubricant is key to this massage. Put some on your hand and begin making firm circles over her pubic bone. If she has hair there, be careful not to pull on it. Go slowly. You are close to the clitoris when stimulating this area, but not actually touching it. The clit is so sensitive, however, that this will be a great warm up.

4.  Now it’s time to make your way further down. Still avoiding direct contact with her clitoris, use your lubricated thumb or index finger to stroke up and down the inside of her labia (“lips”). Softly squeeze the lips together and pull them apart. Make small circles with the tips of your fingers up and down this area. Stroke her lips at varying speeds (never too fast) and varying amounts of pressure (never hard) on the inside and outside. There are branches of the clitoris found in the labia which feel amazing when stimulated in this way.

5. Now run your finger straight down the middle of her vulva. Begin at the pubic bone and lightly make a trail straight down over the clitoris, between her lips, over the vaginal opening and down to the perineum (this area between the vaginal opening and the anus). The perineum is very sensitive. Spend a few minutes just massaging this area, making circles of different sizes and shapes with your finger or thumb.

6. Now this next part might sound a little strange, but now you’re going to massage her urethral opening (the urethra is the tube where urine leaves the body). The urethra also is right next to the G spot, so it is a great area for stimulation. It’s located between the clitoris and vaginal opening. Stimulate it in the same way that you stimulated the other areas of her vulva, with varying circular motions.

7. Finally you’re ready to directly stimulate the clitoris. Begin by massaging the area on either side by running your fingers along the area. Then lightly squeeze the clit together and release. Then with the lightest touch possible, begin to make small, soft circles over her clitoris.

8. When going down to her vaginal opening, draw your finger around the opening in circular motions. Then insert your finger just slightly and remove. Repeat.

9. Once you’re fingering your partner, crook your finger forward to hit her G spot. Make the same small, circular motions on her G spot. Stroke in and out with your finger still bent. Do 9 shallow insertions and one deep one and repeat.

10. Combine fingering in this way with outer massage at the same time.

11. Once she has climaxed just hold her in your arms and stroke her hair or back.

This is a very powerful massage that you can do any time you want. It’s especially pleasurable for the woman because it goes at her pace and never tries to rush through to the next thing.

Kisses,
Gabrielle Moore

P.S. To discover more advanced tips and techniques about fingering CLICK HERE NOW!

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There is something that you can do tonight that she’s going to love, and it’s probably something you haven’t done for a really long time. I’m talking about fingering. It’s probably something you do every once in awhile during foreplay, or it might be something you haven’t done since you were a teenager. Either way, fingering is what’s on the menu the next time you want to get intimate with your partner, and I’m going to tell you exactly how to do it to blow her mind!

* Fingering is a great change of pace to the regular sex act. Instead of making it part of foreplay, this time fingering her is going to be the main event. If done the right way, it feels amazing and it will make her a little nostalgic for her younger years when fingering was all kids did!

*  Another great thing about fingering is that it’s easy to incorporate clitoral stimulation. This is great news because many women don’t orgasm from penetration alone. Even though you can stimulate her clit during sex, a lot of men don’t and some positions are tricky. When you’re hands are down there you have everything you need to give her a great orgasm.

* One final benefit of this hot sex act is that your partner can just lie back, relax and focus on receiving pleasure. It’s rare that a woman gets to be the total focus of sex, so spoil her and let her enjoy it!

* So, let’s get down to business. Before even entering the bedroom you need to make sure that your hands and nails are well manicured. This means making sure they are clean, as soft as possible, nails trimmed and hangnails clipped.

* Use lubrication. A good lube is so important when it comes to clitoral stimulation and fingering. Even though she has her own natural lubrication when she gets turned on, this isn’t enough. A silicone based lube feels incredible and therefore should always be used when you finger her.

* Don’t go straight for the genitals. In order to build up anticipation and increase the intensity of her sensation and orgasm, you want to tease her a bit. Start by kissing her and slowly undressing her. Touch her body, but make a point to avoid her genitals. Slowly make your way towards her vulva, ever so slowly, making sure that you’re really building up the intensity.

* You’re going to need both hands for this. Use one to finger her and the other you’ll use for stimulating her clitoris. With the clitoris hand, start slow and VERY gently making circles over the areas with your lubed up fingers. Start fingering her with your other hand, first with just one finger and then graduate to two. You can also begin to increase the intensity as she gets more turned on.

* Check in with her. Ask her if she likes one finger or two. Ask her if she wants you to be more gentle or touch her with more intensity. It’s a great time to slow down and watch her. Take note of what she likes and dislikes. This is a good way to learn more about her body because your attention is completely focused on giving her pleasure and her reactions to your touch.

* Do a variety of motions and combinations with your two hands. With your hand that is stimulating her clit, try making circles with your thumb, running your finger up and down the length of her clit, and from side to side. With your hand that is fingering her, try different speeds and intensities. Try thrusting shallow and then deep. Crook your finger up in a “come hither” motion as you finger her. Twist your wrist as you move your fingers in and out of her vagina. Try just stimulating her clit alone, then just fingering her alone, then combine the two things. All the time you’re doing this you should also be observing her reactions and checking in with her verbally if necessary.

* Put her in charge. Let her know that you want to please her. Tell her to signal to you if she wants you to continue doing something or stop doing something. You can even give her a way to signal to you without speaking, like tapping your arm if she likes something.

Have a great time! Giving your partner manual stimulation is a lot of fun and a great way to break out of your normal sex routine.

Kisses,
Gabrielle Moore

P.S. To discover more advanced tips and techniques about fingering techniques CLICK HERE NOW!

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One of the pleasure techniques that men don’t use enough in the bedroom is fingering. Even though using your fingers to pleasure your partner is a great resource, a lot of guys stop using fingering once they have already had sex with a woman. Maybe they think of it as a more juvenile sex act than intercourse, but that’s definitely not true. Whatever works to give your partner pleasure is a wonderful thing. So, with that said, what is the best way to use your hands to give pleasure? Check out the following 6 fingering techniques that will drive your partner wild with pleasure…

1. Circles over the hood – Many guys think that fingering is just inserting their fingers into their partner’s vagina, but it can and should be so much more than that. Fingering doesn’t even have to involve penetration, necessarily, in fact, this first technique doesn’t. This technique involves stimulating the clitoral hood, which is the area located just above the clitoral head. The head of the clit is extremely sensitive and should be avoided when you first start stimulating this area. That’s why stimulating the hood is a great way to get warmed up. Use some good quality lube and draw little circles over the clitoral hood with the tip of your finger. You can alternate between using the tip of your middle finger and your thumb.

2. The electric slide – Once your partner is warmed up and turned on, you can move on to the second technique, the electric slide. Take the same tip of your finger, lubed up and slide it gently up and down the length of her clit. Then slide your finger up and down either side of her. Sometimes directly touching her clit can still be too sensitive and in that case, sliding your finger up and down one side and the alternating to the other side can feel really amazing.

3. Stimulating the head – With any clitoral stimulation, you always want to be very gentle. It’s a really sensitive area, more sensitive than any area of your body, so it’s important that you always remember to have a very light touch. With this technique you will be directly stimulating the clitoral head with tiny, gentle circles with the tip of your finger. This technique should only been done after already warming your partner up with less direct clitoral stimulation. Watch for cues that this might be too much for her, some women love it and others find it too intense.

4. Finger fucking – This is the technique most commonly thought of as “fingering.” Although this is the most common way to finger a woman, a lot of men don’t really know what they’re doing here. You’ll use one or two lubed up fingers to penetrate your partner. Start with one finger and then move on to two if you think it’s necessary. Men think that women often want multiple fingers inside them, but oftentimes one finger is plenty to get the job done. When you start to finger her be sure to focus only on the first ? of the vagina. This is the part that has the most nerve ends (around the opening). Move your finger in and out, twisting your wrist around. This feels even better when you can combine it with clitoral stimulation.

5. Incorporating the G Spot – You’ve probably heard of the G spot before, but have you ever tried to find it and stimulate it? Here’s your chance. Insert your finger into her vagina about two knuckles deep. It is a small dime-sized patch of rough flesh on the inner wall of the vagina. It’s only really noticeable when a woman is turned on, so make sure you have already utilized a few of the above techniques to help get your partner warmed up and ready to go. Rub, tap, and circle your finger over that little patch of flesh. This is a situation where you can use some pressure in order for her to really feel the stimulation. Some women also really enjoy a combination of clitoral stimulation and G spot stimulation at the same time.

6. Fingering her bum – The next and final level of fingering involves fingering her anus. A lot of women need to be turned on first in order to enjoy and relax into this kind of stimulation. Once she is ready, insert one lubed up finger into her anus. You don’t need to insert it very far because all of the nerve endings are at the opening. Just the tip is sufficient. Finger her in this way while you stimulate her clit for a powerful orgasm.

Happy fingering, fellas!
Gabrielle Moore

P.S. To discover more advanced tips and techniques about fingering CLICK HERE NOW!

Click Here For More Advanced Sex Secrets…

Okay, guys, I’m not going to waste your time going on and on about how a lot of guys don’t know what they’re doing when it comes to manually stimulating their woman. You might not think of fingering as something you do to bring your partner to orgasm. Maybe it’s just something you do for a minute during foreplay. Maybe it’s something you haven’t done in years. Let me share something with you, if you’re not fingering your partner regularly, you’re really missing out on an amazing way to give her pleasure. Here’s what you need to know…

1. “Fingering” can be a misleading term – Although fingering is nice and it can feel great, most women cum from having their clitoris stimulated. That’s why I prefer the term “mutual masturbation” to fingering. This covers anything you do with your hands to her genitals. Now, I’m not saying fingering isn’t great, but you should know if your partner can cum from penetration alone. The majority of women cannot and need clitoral stimulation in order to orgasm.

2. Women are as different as snowflakes – Okay, well maybe they’re not THAT different, but it’s true that different techniques work for different women. What one woman likes, another might hate (or only think is okay). SO you need find out specifically what your partner likes. What worked for previous girlfriends might not work at all. Investigate, try new things and find what she LOVES, not just what she likes.

3. No more “flicking the switch” – When most guys think of rubbing a woman’s clit, they think of vigorous rubbing from side to side, almost like you’re frantically flicking a light switch on and off. You may have even heard of it referred to as flicking the switch. A study that talked to real women about what they liked in bed found that only 1 out of 48 women actually enjoyed that. Most found it uncomfortable and/or painful.

4. “Fingering” should be done during foreplay AND sex – Don’t forget to stimulate your partner’s clitoris during sex as well as during foreplay. Remember that most women won’t have an orgasm from penetration alone, so you need to have busy hands if you want her to get the most out of it.

5.  Take your time getting there – A lot of men go straight for her pussy because that’s what they want a woman to do when touching them, but women actually enjoy a build up a lot more. Take your time touching and kissing her in other areas before even thinking about putting your hands between her legs.

6. Tease her – Once you do make your way down there, continue to take your time and let the tension build up little by little. Tease and titillate her by touching the areas around the clit, sweeping a finger over it lightly, but then moving away.

7. Use the hood to your advantage – You may have heard or noticed that the clitoris has a flap of skin that covers and protects it. This is because the clitoris is extremely sensitive and this skin helps to keep it from being over stimulated. Some guys pull this skin right back and start rubbing away at the clit, but this is way too much stimulation for most women. Instead try stimulating the clitoris slowly and softly moving the skin of the hood over the clitoris underneath. This provides a good balance of stimulation.

8. Always use lube generously – Just like it feels better when someone rubs you down with a lubed up hand, you should always make sure you use lube on her. Start with lube on your hand and then continuously use the natural lubrication from her vagina and spread it over her vulva with your fingers. This feels silky smooth and amazing.

9. Use a light touch – Since the clit is crazy sensitive, you need to make sure your touch is extremely light as well. Since men don’t have such a sensitive area of their body, it’s hard for them to imagine just how lightly they need to stimulate this area. Use the lightest touch possible, and then make it even a little more light!

10. Pay attention – Make sure she is moving her hips around in pleasure, not discomfort. Pay attention to the signs she’s giving you to tell you if she likes something or not. Watch her facial expressions and her body language. Listen to the sounds she’s making. And when all else fails, ASK her if she likes something. There’s nothing better than a man who KNOWS what his woman likes.

Kisses,
Gabrielle Moore

P.S. To discover more advanced tips and techniques about fingering CLICK HERE NOW!

Click Here For More Advanced Sex Secrets…
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All fingers are not created equal! If you’re down for offering her some explosive orgasms that make her scream “I’ve never met someone like you!”, check out my special training tips&tricks.

Over the years, I have realized something that’s true for each and every woman, no matter the shape and size: the main thing that truly helps us achieve the elusive orgasm is not a complicated technique — it’s simply being relaxed. You can probably also relate to this. When you experience anxiety in the bedroom, your performance is totally ruined, leaving you even more insecure and confused.

No matter how confident she seems, she needs to feel relaxed around you in order to experience all those amazing sensations you can create for her. Otherwise, all of your efforts will be useless. We all know by now that female orgasm is complicated and not easy to reach — the most recent studies regarding this issue have shown that only around 30% of women experience orgasms consistently during sex (85% for men, lucky you!) — but we also know that some serious advances have been made. We know so much more about all those small sensitive details that go into the art of pleasuring a woman. We know that almost every woman can climax and even have multiple orgasms if the circumstances are right for her… and those circumstances usually involve you. She needs a caring and understanding man who is willing to learn more about sexual pleasure every day (if you’re reading this, you are that man and you have my admiration!), and who uses his knowledge to help her relax and reach that absolute sensation we all crave.

Fingering is a great way to get intimate with your partner because it can also be approached as an intense foreplay, without the pressure which usually comes from penetration. It’s also extremely valuable to you because it helps you understand her intimate anatomy before going to the next level. Why is that important? Well, because — let’s get real here — some men don’t even know where their partner’s clitoris is located. If that is or was the case for you, I’m not blaming you and there’s nothing to be ashamed of. The epicenters of pleasure are really sneaky when it comes to women. For example, some women have a visible clitoris even without stimulation. Others have it covered by little folds of skin which resemble a tent. Some women have large outer labia, while others appear to have none. And if you think porn can give some insight, you might be wrong — porn stars go through cosmetic surgery to make their lady parts appear more attractive to men, so there’s not much diversity there.

But diversity is beautiful, don’t you think? And the beauty of it all is the discovery. It’s in your power to explore and discover all of her epicenters of pleasure, and what better tool to work with than your hands? If you’ve tried fingering before but it wasn’t her cup of tea, you haven’t tried my special techniques yet. Read on to make fingering more enjoyable than ever for you both!

Take a dive together

Now that we know relaxation is key to better sex (and lots of orgasms!), you wanna make sure she feels 100% sexy and relaxed around you. It’s going to be worth it, I assure you. Because a relaxed and confident woman is much more willing to give you everything you’ve ever imagined in bed!

So what could be sexier than taking a luxurious bath together? Make sure that bubble bath smells great and keep a massage oil on hand. While sitting behind her in the bathtub, lather up her body with your bare hands, using slow and sensual movements, and rather long ones: start from the shoulders, make a brief stop on her boobs and then let your hands slide all over her body until you reach her calves. Then go back and reach her intimate area with both hands while slowly biting her ear. Dominate her in a subtle way by slowly massaging that area with both hands — this sends a powerful erotic message: “You are mine and I accept and want all of you”. You will feel her opening up to you. If she opens her legs slightly, massage her clit while putting one finger inside of her slowly. Don’t forget that the level of lubrication is affected underwater, therefore be very gentle. Give her just a taste of what’s coming.

Make it even more slippery

Slip is important when it comes to female pleasure. You score big time if you’re also able to stimulate all of her senses, and the easiest way to do that is using an aromatic massage oil. Treat her after the bath: while her body is still slightly wet, rub some aromatic oil all over her, insisting on her lady parts (make sure the oil is gentle and safe to use in the intimate area). The pleasant smell and the erotic scenery will open her up to you in a relaxed atmosphere, where she’s feeling safe and desired. If necessary, add an oil based lube to the mix before you finger her vagina — the extra slip will make things a lot more comfortable and therefore pleasurable for her.

A little oral action

A lot of women are actually intimidated by oral sex and don’t find it pleasurable at all, but that’s only because they are unable to relax and open up to this incredibly sexy and intimate experience. After you’ve applied the relaxation methods above, she’ll be ready to enjoy it, so add a little oral action to the mix. While penetrating her with your index and middle finger, caress her clitoris with your lips for a few seconds, then use your tongue to lick it like you would an ice-cream, but do it very slowly while making eye contact. She will go mad with pleasure! Now that she’s getting wetter, you can move your fingers a little faster, while using the other hand to apply more pressure on her clitoris. Remember — clitoris is key to unlock her pleasure potential, so make sure to always involve it!

Hot kisses,

Gabrielle Moore

P.S. Sweetheart, now you know you can accomplish so much by using a few relaxation methods while pleasuring her with your hands. For even more advanced techniques on the fine art of fingering, I invite you to check out my intensive course on the matter — Flirting Fingers — and become a true expert!

Click Here For More Advanced Sex Secrets…

One of the saddest of all statistics on our collective sexual health is about how little time we spend on foreplay, with the average sexual act as a WHOLE lasting only 7-12 minutes. Sexual foreplay is the moment when the arousal mechanism in the limbic brain gets to align with the blood flow to the genitals, so yea, it’s pretty darn important and skipping it is basically ruining your entire sexy time.

So, let me just say one thing about this phase of intimacy—more is better. This is what I say to patients who come in and tell me that their sexual encounters failed because, I don’t know, their lube didn’t work or they were stressed or whatever. When I ask them about the time they spent on foreplay, and their response is ‘what foreplay, we went straight to business’, I have to explain the limitations of even the best sex positions or even the most experienced lovers. A body that is unprepared to be penetrated will not automatically turn on. Never in a million years, my friends. The truth is, the more attention we pay to the beginning of our intimate acts, the easier and more successful it gets at the end.

In this way, sex is kind of oxymoron. We all worry about successfully climaxing, of being able to get to the golden ring of orgasm, but by placing our attention there we miss the juicy and most compelling parts of coupling, which is foreplay. Becoming more comfortable and curious in the early give-and-take of sexual foreplay techniques is how we cultivate a veritable harvest of passion and even sometimes orgasmic pleasure that will surprise us.

Follow this short path to extending the love you are making and you will be harvesting volumes more pleasure than you can find in a quick in and out.

Explore Sexuality Through the Senses

One way to consider extending your foreplay time is to allow your thinking to get filtered through your nose, which will heighten not only your sense of smell but also your sense of touch and taste. Awakening our arousal mechanism does not happen in the genitalia, but in the limbic brain, which is co-located right there with your olfactory sense, where your smell is processed.

Learn the Magic Contained in the Fingers
(To see this technique explain in explicit detail, click here)

Our hands are a work of art. Our fingers have some of the densest areas of nerve endings in the body and provide the richest source of tactile feedback available to us. The sensations we can feel through our hands are not just physical either, they can both interpret and transmit energetically.  Our hands are the perfect instruments for providing pleasure. Their combined capacity for strength and flexibility allows us to touch each other in ways that transmit feelings like no other sexual act out there.

Touch takes on heightened meaning when we give it our full attention. Arguably, we can say at least as much and maybe more with our hands as we do with our words.  Little is misunderstood as the body receives true communication from the hands. Yet, inattentive touch can also make a woman recoil. To really touch, we have to bring our full presence to the tips of our fingers. Genital tissue is like none other in the body and there is maybe nothing more erotic than spreading oil into the folds and crevices that are as unique as our fingerprints, but alight with nerve endings.

Give Up the End Zone

Being deliberate about growing your comfort zone in foreplay techniques will translate into not only a more curious and passionate sexuality, but will also be mirrored in an opening in the emotional relationship. Putting the focus on expanding foreplay also reduces the performance pressure and anxiety often associated with the act of sexual intercourse, which is too often played as a race to an orgasmic finish you can’t quite locate. The truth is that orgasmic potential builds over time and when you stop chasing after it can envelop you, even in foreplay.

Taking our time for erotic discovery is everything. Mindful touching is practically prayer and it is the crevasse that exists between hooking up and making love to someone. Bringing our full attention to the nerve endings meeting between our fingertips and genital tissue is a fireworks display.  If you are not in a mindless hurry to get somewhere else, lingering in this energetically charged exchange for as long as possible can only make the end better.

Setting a goal, even if it’s just an additional five minutes each time you are intimate, is an easy way to train your focus on the moment and away from the ending.

Hot kisses,

Gabrielle Moore

P.S. For more information about using your fingers in hot new ways, check out my program on the matter – Flirting Fingers.

Click Here For More Advanced Sex Secrets…

Don’t get me wrong – fingering is a great way of intensifying her pleasure and even give her a powerful orgasm without penetration. Nonetheless, most women don’t enjoy fingering and a few of my friends even hate it.
“What’s the deal with fingering? I don’t get it. I’ve never met a man who could make me feel other than uncomfortable while doing it. My current boyfriend is really rough and moves so fast that I can’t even tell what’s going on down there. Sometimes I have to stop him because it becomes painful and it ruins our night together. I don’t know, I think fingering is overrated”, says Alissa, 34.

When done wrong, fingering can be the most annoying thing a woman can experience – it actually resembles a visit to the gynecologist (not pleasant!) more than sexy play. So encourage your woman to give you honest feedback on this, because if she doesn’t actually like it, you have to improve your skills ASAP, before it ruins your sexual connection.
Here are the most common reasons why your fingering technique might be wrong and also a few essential suggestions on how to give her orgasmic sensations!

1. You’re too rough

As my friend says, the most common mistake men make is being too rough. Remember that going faster doesn’t necessarily equal more pleasure. The secret is always some kind of balance between the right rhythm and the right amount of pressure. The skin surrounding the vagina and the vagina itself is really sensitive, especially during sex, so the wrong strokes will put her off in no time.
Pro tip: Start with just one finger and move your way up to two fingers as she’s getting more turned on. Move slowly while kissing her lips, making it more of a sensual experience, without the pressure of climaxing. Pay attention to her moans and body language and start to go faster and faster as she gets wetter.

2. You don’t consider lube

Not all women are naturally wet enough for fingering action, no matter how turned on they are. And if she’s not very wet, she’ll feel more pain than pleasure. If your thing is to get right at it without any warning or lube, you have zero chances of giving her an orgasm and every chance to annoy her.
Pro tip: Saliva isn’t always the best lube in the world because it can be quite acidic and besides the effect doesn’t last long. Always have some coconut oil on hand or even a water-based lubricant. Put in on your fingers before going inside of her – I promise her sensations will amplify instantly!

3. You only move up and down

You know how when she’s on top of you she tends to move more in circular motions than up and down like you tend to do? That’s because this type of pleasure really stimulates the nerve endings in the vagina’s wall, making her feel pleasure more intensely than you can imagine. The up and down movement also works when you penetrate her with your penis, which can reach the walls better, but not the same can be said about fingering. Maybe the movement of your fingers just doesn’t do it for her.
Pro tip: Draw an imaginary circle with your fingers inside of her vagina, making sure to reach her vagina walls properly. Experiment with more types of movements and see what she likes more.

4. You forget the clitoris

What’s fingering without stimulating the clitoris? Just like actual sex, fingering feels better when the clitoral area is involved because it helps her reach orgasm faster. Plus, it’s so easy to involve this area during finger play that it would truly be a shame not to spoil your partner.
Pro tip: Use your thumb to apply pressure on the clitoris while you penetrate her with your index and middle finger. If you want to make it next level, use your mouth at the same time. Lick and kiss her clitoris until she can’t take it anymore.

Hot kisses,

Gabrielle Moore

P.S. Your woman will crave fingering if you do it well – especially since not a lot of men have this skill. If you want to learn more, I recommend you check out my program on the matter – Double Fingering Delight.

Click Here For More Advanced Sex Secrets…